emotionally corrupted



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Am I a ghost?

I am so pissed off when I'm around but you never see me, like I am a ghost? How about you talking with my best friend like I never had existed - yeah, I'm standing right next to her. What did I do wrong so much that you never talk to me? Just talk meh. Join the conversation. I joined the group conversation face-to-face but you never responded mine. I tried to talk to you and make you at ease, less stressful and at peace so that we can converse. But I got nothing. Thanks for making me look like a ghost and again, I don't know what did I do that you make me like this. Please. This is too awkward because it's been more than 4 months and IDK WHY! We're closed to each other and we talked comfortably, we friend with the same friends and we're friends for each other but you make me feel like this like I never existed in front of you? Sometimes I noticed your glare and stare but you avoid me. You walk beside me but never talk to me. We look at each other but we never ta...
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a bad dream

I had a bad dream for the past few days. a dream about a guy who lost his family in an accident. he's a guy whom i'd known before. he kept his sorrows inside. he wasn't crying nor weeping at all. deep down from his heart, he was crying so hard. he's trying to keep away the tears. all I can do. was just sitting far away from him. still, I can see him. he was looking on the floor. his shining face was appearing dull. he's trying so hard with the sadness and sorrows. I walked. moving closer towards him. looking into his eyes. he lost his confidence. he was suffering with his feelings. the feeling of loss. the fear of being alone. the missing moments. the weakness. he's crying in front of me. while covering his pale face. he said, ' I won't be alone forever ' and he walked away from me. As I woke up in the dawn, I prayed that he'll smile and always smile. no matter what happens. that was just a dream. May Allah a...
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We change.

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Hello peeps, Assalamualaikum! The only word I could say after a super long break from blogging is, I AM BACK. Not to mention if it is gonna be for any good or any worse after this. Okay, done. Actually I am a bit _blank_ not to mention my awkwardness right now, typing in the public zone where everyone can take a glance and read whatever I'm typing now. Duh! Okay, it's midnight and it still is raining heavily outside the window. The darkest sky and the gray clouds, obviously la there's no moon and stars to be seen now kan. (shrug the shoulder). Lately, I've been immersed into somebody's life. I'm trying to act pretentious and act like I know everything when I don't. That is not how I should be. But, it gave me some insights about what are the thoughts and decisions they might come to at the end of the day. Little that I know, I can be like everyone else, just 'follow to flow' and just do whatever they decide for me to do. Hm. That is dangerous s...
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