you know you sick, but you keep going
Hi march! And it's been a while since I've enrolled into a breaking new semester. Naaah, nut dat neuhh a sahhpozt. (well you can read it with no problem only if you have a British accent. lol). I was busy meddling with the never-end businesses. My all time busy-ness. Ain't it fun, to come all the way rushing on the dues of projects? It's tiring babe. Serious talk.
I'm bravely taking this short moment to share something about how to survive a living as a student. Say you pissed off, say you hate it and you don't want to do it ANYMORE no matter what!. Well, say it out loud. Voice are louder than your head. Btw, it's happening to me right now. Again, I'm chasing the date of submission of my research paper. It's like a short thesis, where words are limited to 2000. Madam said that she won't be reading much on our long essays, but she'll try to go through them as much as she could.
It was last night when I became seriously haywire. I saw everything's squiggling. Laughing as much I could and stressing alone. When I thought of giving up, I remembered why I held on for this long. Plus, I've been resisting all the doubts, scares and I had pushed everything's that would break my emotions into tears and fears away. I was thinking of changing my outlines and my essay's topic means that I'll back to zero. It was not too late to change it I thought. So I started a new research which to me at least, it seems simpler than the one I did before. The research begun.
This morning, however I decided to keep going. Shockingly, with my previous hung-up research topic. And I've set my mind that I'm going to do a lot of improvising. A LOT. For me, there's no need to turn back after miles. Gratefully, I started my improvising, renewing the sources and adding more relevant issues. Well, I learned that every choice is risky. Nothing's easier. No pain, no gain.
Soon, everything's seems to be even complicated than ever. I know that I'm going to cry again. But there's no to pissed off. It's a great effort to praise myself for. I know that I'm sick of doing it, but I keep walking. Here to say that I believe that I can walk better sooner or later. It's okay to walk when your friends are running. Take it easy babe. Since I just remembered today is Friday, I grab the Quran and read Surah Yaasin. And yes, I find the ease in my soul. Remember that Allah won't grant you nothing's harder than your limit? For every hardship, there comes the ease (94:5).
p/s Kadang-kadang aku cakap aku taknak, tak suka, malas itu malas ni. At the end of the day, aku buat jugak in any conditions sekalipun. It's a matter of sooner or later. Everyone just need some time for themselves to recover. And go back to the basics: Quran and Sunnah. Tak susah pun, ambil ibrah dari pengalaman sendiri atau pemerhatian. Then, refer Quran. 1 verse and it's translation pun dah cukup untuk bagi kita fikir betapa sayangnya Allah pada kita. And to Allah you may ask anything (Surah Al-Sharh:8).
I'm bravely taking this short moment to share something about how to survive a living as a student. Say you pissed off, say you hate it and you don't want to do it ANYMORE no matter what!. Well, say it out loud. Voice are louder than your head. Btw, it's happening to me right now. Again, I'm chasing the date of submission of my research paper. It's like a short thesis, where words are limited to 2000. Madam said that she won't be reading much on our long essays, but she'll try to go through them as much as she could.
It was last night when I became seriously haywire. I saw everything's squiggling. Laughing as much I could and stressing alone. When I thought of giving up, I remembered why I held on for this long. Plus, I've been resisting all the doubts, scares and I had pushed everything's that would break my emotions into tears and fears away. I was thinking of changing my outlines and my essay's topic means that I'll back to zero. It was not too late to change it I thought. So I started a new research which to me at least, it seems simpler than the one I did before. The research begun.
This morning, however I decided to keep going. Shockingly, with my previous hung-up research topic. And I've set my mind that I'm going to do a lot of improvising. A LOT. For me, there's no need to turn back after miles. Gratefully, I started my improvising, renewing the sources and adding more relevant issues. Well, I learned that every choice is risky. Nothing's easier. No pain, no gain.
Soon, everything's seems to be even complicated than ever. I know that I'm going to cry again. But there's no to pissed off. It's a great effort to praise myself for. I know that I'm sick of doing it, but I keep walking. Here to say that I believe that I can walk better sooner or later. It's okay to walk when your friends are running. Take it easy babe. Since I just remembered today is Friday, I grab the Quran and read Surah Yaasin. And yes, I find the ease in my soul. Remember that Allah won't grant you nothing's harder than your limit? For every hardship, there comes the ease (94:5).
p/s Kadang-kadang aku cakap aku taknak, tak suka, malas itu malas ni. At the end of the day, aku buat jugak in any conditions sekalipun. It's a matter of sooner or later. Everyone just need some time for themselves to recover. And go back to the basics: Quran and Sunnah. Tak susah pun, ambil ibrah dari pengalaman sendiri atau pemerhatian. Then, refer Quran. 1 verse and it's translation pun dah cukup untuk bagi kita fikir betapa sayangnya Allah pada kita. And to Allah you may ask anything (Surah Al-Sharh:8).
